What The F*@*#!?!?
Posted: June 22, 2016
How many of you don’t allow curse words in your home? Many of you, like myself, grew up in homes where those kinds of words were not allowed and were dealt with harshly if they crept out. I remember being slapped as a child when I let fly with the “F” word as a mere 3rd grader. Shock and horror plastered on my parents face over my words as well as their response. Ouch. When my son began school, I remembered how much swearing I had heard in school, even in the early grades of elementary school. I remembered not knowing what most of those words meant and also knowing that they were taboo in our house. So one day, with my son in second grade, I asked him what swear words he knew. He said he knew the “s-word” and a “b-word”, but that he didn’t know what those words meant. So we talked about “shit” and just what that word meant, and how it was kind of a rude way to talk about poop. And we talked about “bitch” and how that word actually means a female dog, but sometimes people use it in a really mean way to call others rude names. He took it all in matter-of-factly and didn’t seem all that interested in it. I thought the topic was done. Not too long after that, still in second grade, my son gets in the car and asks me what “fuck” means. Ahem…well, I was sufficiently shocked, and asked him if that was one of the words he had heard other kids say. He said he didn’t hear kids say it, but that it was written in the boys bathroom. Well, on the spot I decided I wasn’t going to shy away from this conversation. I told him “fuck” also called the “f-word” was a rude way of saying sex. And that sex, as I’d already begun talking to him about, was what God intended for mom’s and dad’s to express love to each other and it was also how babies are made, and how the “f-word” was a rude way of referring to sex. He said, “oh, ok” and again, the conversation seemed to be done. My son is 12 now. Just got done with 6th grade. He’s full-on-middle-school preteen now. I make it a point to ask him about what he is hearing in the halls. We often will have conversations about the latest gross things other kids are saying and how even though we don’t talk like that in our house, I still want to know what is going on in his life. My goal is simply this: I want to be a part of every aspect of my child’s life and I want to make my values known to him in each of those areas. Sometimes it makes for really awkward conversations, and sometimes I get a shock by what comes out of his mouth. But through it all, I want my kids to know that there is nothing that is too taboo for them share with me. Parents. I encourage you to talk with your kids frequently about what new and shocking things they are hearing in elementary school and reading in the bathrooms. Because if you begin in elementary school, it makes middle school and high school so much easier to be a part of your child’s life.